Becoming a Death Doula

9 lunar events ago, my rabbit had died.

After several months of sitting in my grief, I decided to do the one thing I needed for myself which was to heal myself and seek out my fellow friend and personal astrologist. I was advised by her to try my hand at becoming a death doula after extensively studying my birth chart. She asked "Death must have been a big part of your life growing up, have you ever felt that?"

I quickly flashed back to every instance in my life where I was face-to-face with Death. Either when discussing family affairs with my parents and our legacy, discussing my dad's history as a boat refugee, going to 3 of my friend's funerals, or my own confrontation with Death as I was battling suicidal ideation and severe abuse.

I realized very early in my upbringing that I had learned to adapt to the idea that Death was going to always follow me around, and that I had better get used to it. Death made me reevaluate my own humanity and how I was going to show up for myself. I quickly absorbed texts that discussed how to prepare a will, how to plan for funerals, the history of death, and other death practices around the world.

Enter my first brush with the concept of Death Doulas through Caitlin Doughty (otherwise lovingly known to me as "Ask a Mortician" and founder of "The Order of the Good Death"). I had always considered having a death doula for myself at the end of my existence because I didn't want the responsibility to fall into the hands of my family. But now years later, the thought never occurred to me to actually become a death doula... and yet it makes sense. People have always naturally come to me to seek advice, or a listening ear. I AM someone who is recognized within my community as a healer, not just a tarot reader and artist.

But Andrea, what IS a Death Doula?

Many recognize what a doula is (similar to a figure who aids a mother in welcoming new life and getting ready for this event in a more holistic sense). Death Doula is similar in that you are getting an individual ready for a life transition - their own death.

Think of it like party planning, but for the end of your life. Death Doulas help you plan your funeral, get everything in order, help you sit with your own grief, and make sure you have no regrets, process unfinished business. Almost like being "the Grim Reapers Associate" but without the "grimness." In some instances it's almost like therapy and counselling for your family and loved ones to process their grief before, during, and after your death - a "Death Social Worker," so to speak.

I sat with this thought for sometime and asked fellow artists what they thought and how they felt if I were to transition into death doula work, and it's been met with tremendous support. My dear friend, Anson, expressed that he saw how much people valued what I do as a healer, and so to take on this work (although it sounded emotionally draining) was commendable. The more I sat on it, and spoke with my therapist at length, the more I realized "maybe I'm cut out for this line of work." I've danced around with my grief. I've created legacy projects on my own in my pet's name and grandparents names without realizing. I've helped strangers, friends, and my own family sit with their grief of losing their loved ones.

I made up my mind, and in November of 2025 I signed up for death doula classes, which happened to coincide with the 9th full moon of Daisy's passing. What better way to show the love and care that my fur-baby gave to me by extending this energy outward to those that need it?

My Death Doula Candidacy

I was surprised at how easily I made myself at home within our online classes. "Wow I really found my people.

I've completed several projects and readings, made likeminded friends, and now I am happy to announce that I am a Death Doula Candidate!

What does this mean for you and me?

It means I can continue to show up for my clients and community in a way that is even more helpful to them.

I'm still creating art and still attending pop-up markets in the city, but this time I'm including more immersive galleries and workshops built on inner reflection. I already have so many ideas that requires planning and execution.

But it also means I'll be offering services as a death doula to help families of the bereaved to prepare for death transitioning and help them process grief.

I can't wait to see what the future has in store for me.